Finally Appy Fizz Cricket Commercial link!

Ok guys...Finally I found the link to the Appy Fizz song that I was searching. Ok..err..it was not me but Shazia who fwded the link to me. Thanks Shazia!!

Enjoy!

http://www.thecricketsong.com/

Malinga Rocks!

It's not just his rock star freakish hair style but his unique sling action bowling also rocks. The 4 wickets that he took against SA in a WC league match recently were awesome and yesterday again he made the NZ opening batsmen jump all around the pitch. The best pace driven, swing bowling that I have seen lately.

Another Siddhu Bouncer!

Was catching up with Turning Point on NDTV today morning. Siddhu as usual hijacked all the air space and started bombarding on Simon Taufel's poor umpiring in the NZ - SL semi final. And then he dropped his bomb - another one of those bouncers - and here it goes:

"Simon Taufel's decision had been so poor yesterday that in the morning he would need 2 hands to hold on to his bumps"

Wow! What was that?

On being reminded by the presenter that this is a family channel so pls mind your words, he roared back "Well I am a family man"!! (?)

I always feel sorry for poor Ajay Jadeja who most of the time is reduced to a mere spectator when both of these guys come for the show.

Hey, leave the kids alone!

As if school kids of today are not burdened by over expectations of their parents, the changing syllabus, the increasing size of their school bags, peer pressure, the future of quotas; we have very conveniently set another 'expectations' from them. This time - winning the cricket world cup in next 4-8 yrs!

1st the Pepsi ad.

And now, seeing another set of ads. by Surf Exel showing 11 small kids holding to their cricket kit, in soiled clothes, posing in 'Lagaan' style. The headline, in the same 'lagaan' typo screams:

Practice Karengey
Daag lagayengey
2015 mein to world cup le hi aayengey

Pluusssee...give the kids a break man!

Am I getting old?

The players I grew up watching, admiring and adoring are all gone.
Steffi Graf
Monic Seles
Gabrelia Sabatini
Pete Sampras
Jim Courier
Michel Jordan
Carl Lewis
Steve Waugh
Andre Aggasi


and now... Brian Lara.

Sigh. I miss them.

Bingo Ads remixed :)

(Video): Show different types of primitive traps used in jungle to catch animals. In different shots show human beings catching animals using different types of traps.

(Audio): प्राचीन युग से मनुष्यों ने शिकार करना सीख लिया था. शिकार करने के लिए वोह trap का प्रयोग करते थे. वोह जंगल में trap को ऐसे जगह रकते जहाँ शिकार पानी पीने आता और उनको पकड लेते. बार बार ऐसा करने से जानवर भी सतर्क हो जाते तो फिर मनुष्यों को अपना दिमाग लगाना पड़ता जानवरो को चतुराई से पकड़ने के लिए.

पर अगर आपको बिना दिमाग लगाए, मसालेदार, तद्कीले crap का आनंद उठाना हो, तो वोह आपको trap से नही मिलेगा. वोह मिलेगा Mid Day ke web edition से.


Mid Day
No Sense, Nonsense.

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What made me write this post?

sample some of the headlines:

Aaj hamari bhi Shaadi hai: Story of a couple who is sharing the big day with Abhi & Ash

Rs. 1.29 lakh suitcase: Story about the Suitcases that Ash is getting from her cousin as wedding gift.

Tag Board on my blog

I have installed a new tag board on my blog. You will find it on the right hand side of my blog ( just below the previous post topics). The suggestion for installing the same came from a hotshot Radio Mirchi RJ (hehehehe...now even I can boast of having celebrity connections) who wanted to leave a message on my blog but there was no 'neutral' message board. Wonder why I never thought about it myself. Perhaps coz till now most of my blog readers were my close friends who used to visit my blog just for my posts.

And as requested, he also took time out from his busy schedule to 'inaugurate' the tag board by posting the 1st message on it :D Thanks Shrikant!

So any messages hat you want to post to me, besides the comments one, you can post it out here. Feedback, any topics that are in your mind, suggestions, any point of debates & opinions...

But make it under 200 characters or else break the message into multiple parts and then post.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Aaj Tak's Intellectual level...

sample the question posed by a journalist at Abhi's so called lover's press conference.

"आपका और अभिषेक का प्यार कैसा था? क्या आप दोनो बाघो में गाना गाया करते थे? या फिर डेक पे प्यार भरे गाने लगा के सुंना करते थे.... आप प्यार कैसे करते थे...प्यार का इजहार कैसे करते थे?


They actually asked a question like that.

Uaaaaaa...papaaa..she hijacked my air space!!!

Uaaaaaaaaaa........

Big B: What happend abhi beta?

Abhi: pappaaaaa...I paid crores for this wedding...got scores of media lined up for exclusive titbits...and some stupid gal called Janhvi has stolen my show...the entire media is covering her and not my wedding papaaaa...waaaaaaaaaaaaa.uaaaaaaaa...:( :(

Big B: Calm down beta..lemme find out.. Koi Hai!! Darbaaan!!!

Amar: Ji bulaya?

Big B: Just find out..what's the matter... who is this gal who made this wedding into a bollywood script.

What I expect all news channels to beam on 20th :)

What I expect to hear on Aaj Tak, Start News, Zee news and other clone channels the whole the day long on 20th april:
(excuse the mistakes made in hindi...it's not that Idon't know the grammar but figuring it out in blogger is very difficult:- )

- दर्शको को अब हम सीधा जुहू में स्तिथ अमिताभ बचन के घर के पास ले चलते है जहाँ हमारे पत्रकार मोहित सुबह से रिपोर्टिंग कर रहे है। बोलिए मोहित...क्या नज़ारा है वहां का?

-मोहित..क्या आप हमारी आवाज़ सुन सकते है? मोहित...?

- लगता है इस शोर और गुल में मोहित के साथ लिंक स्तापित नही हो पा रहा.. जैसे ही होगा हम वापिस वहा चलेंगे। और आज हमारे स्टूडियो में expert पैनल भी है जो इस सदी कि सबसे यादगार शादी पे अपने विचार देंगे..तो शुरू करते है विनोद आप से...क्या ये शादी इस सदी की सबसे बेहतरीन शादी मानी जा सकती है?

-जी हाँ इसमें कोई शक नही कि येः शादी इस सदी कि क्या पर अगले सौ साल तक ऐसी शादी नही देखने को मिलेगी। Ashwarya कि कुंडली स्वयं ब्रहमा ने ऐसे लगता है बनायीं हो..नक्षत्र और चन्द्रमा का जो योग है वोह धातु के अनुसार मूल योग के हर ताल मेल पे है। और...

-एक मिनट विनोदजी हम दर्शको को सीधा अपने सवादाता शिशिर के पास ले चलते है जो विवेक ओबरॉय के घर के नीचे खडे है...बोलिए शिशिर..क्या समाचार है वहाँ?

- जी अभिज्ञान..आज सुबह से ओबरॉय घर का एक भी दरवाज़ा नही खुला, सारे पर्दे बंध है ..वातावरण ऐसा है जैसे किसी शमशान घाट में खडे हो और अगर देखा जाये तो विवेक ओबरॉय के टूटे हएय प्यार कि आज आहुति चदने वाली है प्रतीक्षा में। जलसा वहां हो रहा है और यहाँ पुरा सन्नाटा है... कहने में ये भी आया है कि आज विवेक सलमान खान के घर पे जायेंगे रात को और दोनो दारू के जाम से अपने गम को भुलाएँगे...मेरे साथ याहा कुछ लोग है ..आयेए उन से उनकी राय पूछते है॥ कैसा लग रहा है आपको?

-जी ये जो भी हो रह है अछा नही हो रहा..विवेक के लिए बुरा लग रहा है..भगवान उनकी आत्मा को ठंडक दे...
- जी धन्यवाद...तो अभिज्ञान आप देख सकते है याहां तो ऐसे लग रहा है कि शोक सभा हो रही है...अभिज्ञान

-जी..धन्यवाद..ये थे हमारे सम्वादाता विवेक के घर के पास से..हम अब लेंगे एक छोटा से ब्रेक और ब्रेक के बाद सीधा ले चलेंगे आपको सलमान के घर के पास...

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Thank god for Discovery Travel & Living. or else, Iwould have been dead.

Welcome aboard the Kamasutra Express

Don't get shocked if next time you reach railway station to catch a train and see a reservation chart that looks like this:

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TRAIN: KAMASUTRA EXPRESS (6969 UP)

COACH: S1 POSITION FROM ENGINE: WHICHEVER YOU LIKE HONEY

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NAME I AGE I SEX I STATUS

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Lokesh I 31 I ANYTIME! I WAITING (4 MORE)

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Shocked, you board the train. More shock, all attendants are babes dressed in tight reds & black. In dinner plate, instead of sauf packet, you get a single condom sachet. As you roll up the blanket on yourself, it emits a fruity flavor fragrance which reminds you of something....

As the journey ends, the attendants give you a return gift - original Kamasutra manuscript & DVD of the same named movie.

Sounds like fantasy? Mark my words, this would happen soon.

My sadastic dream...

...to install those HUGE search light kind of boxes which you find in prisons on top of my car and switch it on in incoming traffic when confronted with stupid morons who drive in city roads with high beams on, blinding them out, if not permanently, at least for a few days.

hehehe..the very thought of executing it brings a gleam in my eyes.

मा..मैं मराठी में लिख सकता हुं माँ

कोण मनाला कि माला मराठी लिह्ता नयी येत. हे पहा। मी मराठी मधे आपला पहिला वाकया लिहला।

Kiss Kiss ka Muh band karuin!

Heard rakhi sawant on radio Mirchi today talking all crap about how Shilpa Shetty should have reacted - how she had taken up the bton on behalf of entire woman hood ( meri bhartiya behney) when Mikka had kissed her...and whole lot of other shit.

Interestingly, none of these moral cruisaders raised an eyebrow when images of Mika kissing rakhi hogged all electronic airspace. Areey bhai...woh Rakhi sawant hai.... chalta hai.

Feel like puking each time I hear all this bullshit of culture getting polluted, playing with dignity of womenhood by acts like these and all. these are the very men who throng theatres, 1st day 1st show to watch Malika Sherawat dole out 17 kisses or whistle out when celina or any other hot bodied babe let loose their steam on the screen.

Gawwad.

How bad can a day get...

I leave at 9 am. get stuck in Aundh..thanks to the diversion that Police has made for the speedy completion of Pune University flyover, take a u-turn drive down 15 kks again back and take another road to reach camp, on the way get into argument with a rickshaw driver coz I splashed water on him (to be honest...I did that intentionally coz I was honking and he didn't give me side), feel bad about what I did, bump into some call center cab jokers who whiz past me from a wrong side almost scrapping my car, angered I waltz down narrow Koregaon road and overtake them and give them a taste of their own medicine (Hritik Roshan style - the way he performs in that karizma bike ad), feel good about it and then - meet with a minor accident with a biker who comes from opp end driving straight down but looking at left and talking to someone, bumps into my right hand side mirror & back tyre fender, breaks both of them, instead of accepting his fault tries to get chauda (thanks to the public sympathy that nearby jhuggi walla gave him) and later settles for 100 bucks for marham patti. Whew...and the day has just started.

You know you are in Pune when....

You wake up early morning, find the weather really pleasant and breezy thanks to unseasonal rains & hail storm that has brought the temp down, pad up and go for a walk and bump into people with their jackets & scarfs on! :D

Rahul Gandhi: Stamp of arrogance or calculated moves?

So, Mr Prime Minister has kind of officially announced which I guess everyone knew would happen some day. Rahul Gandhi is the future (read: in some point of time in future, he would become the PM), so support him. Sigh! Politics. It can make sane men like Dr. Manmohan Singh make insane statements like these in PM's role.

Having said that, I have been tracking some of the moves made by Rahul in UP elections. I think the young man is courting controversies. Nothing wrong with that, after all to be a successful politician or even be a 'noticed' one, you need to be involved in some controversies! But it's his whole outlook that makes you wonder whether this young man reinforces the 'Gandhi Nehru Dynasty' beliefs. Notice all his statements - Had a Gandhi been in rule, Babri wouldn't have happened, India won freedom bcoz of Gandhi and the latest one - Pakistan got divided bcoz of Gandhi. Worse, the party also supports all the statements (well, they have no choice). Desperate moves by a man who really wants to prove himself and that too in a battleground like UP.

If he is so keen on giving the credits to the Gandhis, he should also remember, that it was a Gandhi who is also remembered with the darkest period in post independence - the Emergency. It was a Gandhi who held back reigns of economic reforms (thanks to which other Asian countries who were no where in picture at that time in terms of growth, are today miles ahead of us), it was a Gandhi again who was the reason of Operation Bluestar, it was a Gandhi again who could have prevented the worse riots that India had seen post independence (after Indira Gandhi's assasination) but dedided to let India burn & innocent people be killed and displaced - scars of which the present generation is still carrying.

All said and done, the powers associated with the Gandhi legacy means that someday he would surely become a PM. Hopefully a matured one.

Duh! Now what do we do with this stock of Pepsi Gold?

(Somewhere deep inside the pepsi corporate office a high level meeting is taking place)

- the Indian team is out. Now we are left with this huge inventory of stupid drink that we launched. What the f**** should we do with it?

- Wish we could stick these bottles deep inside the rear end of the team.

-That won't solve our problems, we need to show sales. Think of something else.

- Oh maaan...I had thought had the team reached last 4, I would have created temp. scarcity of our stock and then sold this Gold in Black. Blah!

- Can't even create any face saving ad. like we did last time when the team crashed out of Champions trophy.

-Which ad?

-The one where we said 'Fir Aaayega India'.

-Hey, that gives me an idea! Let's create an ad again - same wine..errr..i mean on same lines but treated differently. We can always find suckers who would still buy our stock.

-What's the idea?

-We will show 4-5 attitude driven young kids entering a tailor shop ordering indian cricket team's dress. When the tailor starts taking measurements, they ask the tailor for bigger sizes. After taking down the measurements when the tailor asks when would they like the dresses to be deliverd, they will say, after 4 years...as the next world cup, they will win it for India! Then we will show them drinking Pepsi Gold.

-So what's the BIG idea in this commercial?

-Hmmm... for the media & agency release, the big idea is to keep associaton of pepsi alive with the never say die attitude & optimism and the great spirit of keep walking and shit like that..... but between us here....Boss..the BIG idea is to DISPOSE off our existing stock...

- Yeah, this idea works.

- This way, we can still manage to dispose off the stock till the next world cup and then we will launch something new - how about pepsi titanium?

-Forget next year's branding. Concentrate on disposing this year's stock. Tell JWT we are ready with the ad - get it executed quickly. I need to sell that damn Gold stock fast!

Narayan Murthy & the love for gori chamadi

Last week when I heard about the Narayan Murthy National Anthem controversy, I thought it's again one of those media misquotes. I mean, the kind of things that were talked about the controversy, how could a guy like NM say or do things like that. Then I caught NM's quote in a press briefing on TV - that triggered the events. He indeed had said all those things.

Well for all that the man has done for the society & IT industry, I for once don't agree with his current views about the whole thing. His rationale was that there are lots of foreigners on Infy's Mysore Global Campus and playing the anthem would have embarrassed them as they couldn't participate while singing or feel being left out.

Funny isn't it? Somehow our fascination for the 'gora' chamadi still persists in today's world. Blame it on the Raj era. Over the years it has got infused into our system and even if we don't agree to it, but somewhere in the back of the mind, the thought still breeds. US ambassador to India walks past the airport security directly from the airport tarmac and is not cross checked by any security guys. Can you imagine our ambassador doing the same thing in US? Do Universities or schools in US stop singing their national anthem in public if there are any ethnic students in their fold?

NM says his firang staff would have felt embarrassed. I don’t understand what’s there to feel embarrassed about. It’s a national anthem that’s getting played and the firings know it – so what’s the big deal. It’s the excuse of NM that’s not convincing enough. Had he said, oh well we just thought let’s keep it to tunes as and never thought about singing it, chances are, no one would have said anything.

I don't know about Karnataka, but out here in Maharashtra, they start the movie by playing the national anthem - not any instrumental version but full song. As the anthem starts I have occasionally seen many firangs (pune is full of them), get up and stand attentively as it gets played. I don't think they would be understanding a word of it and I doubt if they would like to know also, but they know the importance of a national anthem.

NM as a future president – sounds good. But if this is the kind of thought process that he has, then he is not getting my thumbs up.

Shooter - same ol crap in a new bottle

We have seen it before.

A die hard patriot soldier, engaged in mission, on duty in line of fire, system drops him like hot potato to take care of himself, he retires, few yrs later system needs his help to prevent a presidential assassination, he relents, but system presses his patriotism button, he jumps into play, finds he is on receiving end by the system, goes on revenge path, blows whatever comes in his way, FBI, NSA, ABOL, all kinda acronyms get thrown in the picture and on your face, system comes under scanner but system is too powerful to be punished, in between the same ol shit of weapons of mass destruction, oil pipeline, mass graves in ethopia, fundings et al, in the end wipe system off - the sunny deol way.

The plot is very predictable. If you are a veteran action flick movie fan like me, you would sense out who is the main villan in 1st 30 mins of the movie. Watch Shooter, if you just need to shoot some time, otherwise nothing interesting.

Bheja Fry - simply 'delicious'

There are movies with a subject, the usual ones. And then there are movies that defies the subject. Bheja fry is one of them. A simple storyline (loosely based on French flick Le Diner De Cons) and yet it makes you feel how well a simple story like this can be executed into a full fledged movie. Of course, the credit for it goes to Vinay pathak & Rajata kapoor- the main leads of the movie and Vinay's brother in arms - Ranvir Shorey. A movie that boasts of Rajat kapoor, Vinay & Ranvir - it has to be of a different gerne and Bheja Fry is another feather in their caps.

In a nutshell, the story revolves around Rajat & his friends who every weekend invite some idiot character to entertain them in the pretext of branding it as a talent hunt and laufh their ass off on their expense. Bharat Bhushan (Vinay) is Rajat's finding and next thing you know is how this 'idiot' character through his unintentional behavior makes fool of Rajat.

The movie belongs to Vinay Pathak. He has that perfect timing and panache to add life into any scene & dialogues.

Do go for it. You'll really relish the offering.

Kyoki Wiki Bhi Ek Gyaan Ka Source Hai...

All that you wanted to know about Kyoki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi and didn't know whom to ask.

Try this HOT chicken recipe

The starters that I had our maid's house (more on it in a seperate post below), here's the recipe for it.

Take a tawa. Pour some cooking oil on it and let it heat. Now add some laal grounded mirchi in it. In the oil, put some pre boiled (cooker cooked or otherwise) small chicken pieces (make sure they are small pieces - kabab sized ones). Sprinkle a little salt and some good portion of Chicken masala powder on it. Saute the chicken in that oil till the pieces start turning brownish red. For having that kurkura, crispy effect, saute it for little longer. Ensure that you use a tawa and NOT a pan coz the idea is not to fry the chicken but kind of 'grill' it.

Serve it without any chatni (as that can dilute the crispy flavor) and let the masala of the chicken tingle your toungue.

Enjoy!

Appy Fizz Cricket Jingle rocks!

have you heard the latest Appy Fizz radio jingle? It simply rocks! It's a sarcastic dig on our cricket team. Each time it comes on radio, I ask Suvi to keep her trap shut and lemme listen to it.. :D

I have been trying to search net to find the lyrics or download any audio file but have still not found it.

It goes something like this....

Appy Fizz welcomes back Boys in blue...
u went to the world cup with lots hope...but came back with heads low & gloom..
...
...u got bundled out..but you never let your optimism die...
...u came back in the field with sunsceeen on ur face.....

...dont worry there is always next to next to next next year to look after to....

...appy fizz wishes its cricket boys. .. all the best for their next...errrr..commercial.

Its simply awesum. Will post the link if i find it on thet net :)

socializing of a different kind

Lata, our maid, had been insisting Suvi & me to come and visit her home sometime. Her father-in-law who happens to be the watchman of our building and who we fondly call as kaka treats Suvi more like her daughter - at times greeting us at his night shifts with some chow that he brings along with him. Lata tells us that Suvi resembles his daughter who is married and living in Mumbai - so the extra affection. But more than that, we also have socially never distinguished them as 'watchman' or 'bai' types. On Lata's son's 3rd b'day, we sent across a gift for him and she again extended the invitation to visit her home. We had always been avoiding visiting her not because of any 'class' or 'status' difference but mainly bcoz we knew if we go, she would go out of her way to extend hospitality to us - which financially or time committed wise might look trifle to us, but for her and her family it might make a difference. So this time when she again said come over and we said 'some other time', she felt bad and wondered if we were not coming over coz her house was small. So to set her thoughts to rest, we told her we would come over in evening but don't make any arrangements - we would just spend some time and come back. That made her really happy but she scrapped our point of staying for a while and didn't let us go without having dinner - which again was something I really relished.

Her house was 10 mins walking distance from our apartment in bavdhan. A 2 roomed small house (nearly half the size of my massive Delhi house drawing room ) - shared by 2 families. The inside room had a small 'mori' (open bath area), kitchen & fridge. It housed lata's bro-in-law and his family. The other room was half covered by a desktop system, TV set and 2 almirahs. Tin covered, but kept very neat & clean by Lata & her family.

For dinner we had a spread of chicken - kolapuri style, jeera rice and bhakari. And yes, a few starters also (spicy chicken chops, onion, tomato, cucumber & kaccha mango).

Had a nice time playing with lata's kid and I tried my hands at being a good tutor and teach him some basic English. His parents are stretching hard so that they can enroll him in a decent English medium school.

While walking back home I thought how often we create this web and also get entangled in it of so called 'problems & tensions' around us which takes toll on if nothing else - but mental health. 2 hrs at lata's house and I realized we are far more lucky to be where we are. Seeing her & environment that she lives in, the challenges that life throws at them daily, and yet greeting us with a smile and a scrumptious dinner, I realized our problems are nothing but figment of our imagination. I know the argument would be that every strata has different Lifestyle and its own share of problem types but I think what I learnt was of being thankful to god of where I am today. Compared to the problems & challanges faced by them, some of the 'so called' problems now don't look problem to me at all.

Sach is Life

With sachin too jumping into the cricketing akhada to have 'do-do haath' with Greg, it can't get worse than this. It's not if Greg is right & Sachin is wrong or vicea versa. When sachin speaks - everyone listens and even he knows that. But the problem with Sachin, in this context is, the demi god status that he has acquired and his own 'belief' in it make him difficult to accept the fact that his game has lost the sheen that it had once upon a time. It's like those old maharajas of India - who still believe that they are the maharajas. the world has moved on but they still live in that fancy world. I think the time has come for sachin to sit and smell coffee.

I know what's on your mind...

"Wow...check out that babe's long legs"

(tring...tring..)

Me: "Hi Honey..what's up?"

Suvi: "What were you doing?"

Me: "Nothing...just thinking about you."

Suvi: "Shut up...you liar! You were ogling at some babe's legs"

Me: (spitting the tea I was sipping) "err..no sweetheart..that's not ture. I was reallly thinkn about u..err.."

(click)

Me: "hellooo...helllooo...u there". Wow How the hell she got to know that?

That's how.

Why do processes fail?

In a recent Coke & Pizza session with our MD, I asked Ganesh - why do processes fail? The session is held once a month with randomly selected 10-15 employees where MD and other bigges spend time with employees and have team sessions. The question was triggered by the fact that the entire conversation revolved around processes and usual cliche revolving around it. I asked, we have a process for almost everything under the sun, even there is a process defined for creating a new process - and yet, processes don't get implemented, followed or are not successful. Why do processes fail?

Ganesh said that processes fail beacuse of three reasons. 1) Technology 2) People 3) Leadership

As technology keeps getting complex, processes have also started becoming complex. He gave an example of his old days at NIIT when there was no online timesheet format. There used to be a black diary on each employee's desk. the employee was supposed to fill in his daily time sheet in a sheet from the diary, tear it off and keep it in the 'out' section of his desk. A lady used to come and collect the sheets every evening and manually used to keep a tab of timesheets. Simple process. But as technology started growing & becoming complex, processes also started becoming complex. It's ironical if you ask me, coz the very reason for having a process is to make life simpler for the person.

Why people? Coz They simply don't follow it.

Leadeship - To implement processes you need strong leadeship. otherwsie people below you won't follow it. he gave the Indian Army example. Why no one questions an officer who gives some order to the solider - coz they have to follow the order. So strong leadership is needed to implement the process. I slightly disagree on thsi point coz its the same disgrunted solider who later picks up his gun and either shoots himself or shoots his commanding officer!

I also feel that processes can be implemented if their is an inclination on the part of the person to follow it. There should be a self belief and a conviction. The employee should himself believe in that process for it to be implemented or be successful. If the conviction is not there - nothing can work.

Greg Chapell can vouch for that!